When I’m in a shop with my young children, and there is breakable items, instead of saying, “Don’t touch anything,” I say “Put your hands behind your back.”
It’s helpful to tell children (especially young children) WHAT TO DO rather than WHAT NOT TO DO. This is another example of proactive parenting (rather than reactive).
Related posts:
Be Proactive NOT Reactive
Be Quiet!
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Kelly loves life at both ends of the spectrum: wearing high heel shoes one day and hiking boots the next; sipping tea out of a pretty cup and slurping hot coffee from a camping mug; challenging herself physically and stopping for quiet unhurried moments to feel the wind on her face. Kelly and her husband Matthew seek to live a fun and adventurous life with their four children and pet bird.
24 Comments
Melissa
May 10, 2010 at 8:08 amWhat a great suggestion. I’ll try that next time – it should still work with my boys (6 & 8) 🙂
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 10, 2010 at 9:42 amYes, I still use it for my 8 year old too.
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Michelle
May 10, 2010 at 8:44 amWhen children have dirty hands that need washing (eg. from a painting activity) and you have to get them to the bathroom/sink to clean up, without getting paint on the walls, furniture and anything else children would probably runs their hands over on the way…a good tip is to say
“prayer hands to the sink please”, this way both their hands are touching in a prayer position and the can’t really touch anything, make them concentrate on what they are doing with their hands….or “hands up parade!” meaning hands up in the air above your heads untill we get to the sink.
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 10, 2010 at 9:43 amThat’s exactly it Michelle! I also use the ‘hands in prayers’ for when my children are dirty. Good job Mum.
Sarah
May 10, 2010 at 9:13 amLove this! In our house we have ‘self control’ hands. Where the have to hold their hands together until we say they can let go. We practice this at the dinner table while they wait for mum and dad to finish serving the dinner and sit down.
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 10, 2010 at 9:45 amThat’s great Sarah. It’s great practice waiting at the dinner table because it’s quite a hard thing to do when you have a plate of food in front of you. I like that: self control hands.
Monique
May 10, 2010 at 9:32 amAnother excellent tip thanks Kelly. I have been working on the “Talk in a whisper” one!!
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 10, 2010 at 9:46 amThanks Monique. It does take a bit of work, but worth it. How is the whisper going?
Debbie
May 10, 2010 at 10:09 amWe say ‘Hold your hands’ or ‘Look with your eyes’ – but the first one usually works best. I agree that it’s best to say what to do, rather than what not to do.
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 10, 2010 at 10:33 amYeah, I agree.
Ash
May 10, 2010 at 2:07 pmI had to giggle when I read this, because its EXACTLY the phrase mum said to us, and it works a treat!
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 11, 2010 at 8:59 pmHA! Yes, my Mum used to say it to me as well. I learnt from the best.
Katherine
May 10, 2010 at 5:04 pmyou are SUPERMUMMY! Honestly, these are such great ideas.
I think i am going to have to save your blog so that in 5-10 years when i have little ones, i can come back here and re-read the techniques, they are wonderful!
K xx 🙂
Colin Wee
May 11, 2010 at 1:24 am@Katherine, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell her! Colin
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 11, 2010 at 9:00 pmWell, hopefully I’m still blogging when you have children Katherine. I think you will make a beautiful mother.
Michelle
May 10, 2010 at 7:01 pmLove how encouraging you are Kelly.
I too like the idea of ‘prayer hands’… but don’t think my kids would know where to put them…
I usually say ‘hands in the air’ – but now I will try ‘hands behind your back’ when in shops.
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 11, 2010 at 9:01 pmHA! Having a mental picture of hands in the air. lol
Colin Wee
May 11, 2010 at 1:20 amI typically say “touch only with your eyes,” and “walk forward.”
We use the hands on the laps instruction for Montessori jobs. When I demonstrate a job, I get my child to put his/her hands on his lap so that they can observe what I am doing without interrupting me. When it comes to their turn, I do the same.
Good advice! This should be in my Ministry of Discipline list of articles.
Colin
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
May 11, 2010 at 9:04 pmThat’s great Colin. That reminds me when I talk to my two year old son, I often hold his hands while I talk.
You are welcome to use it if you like Colin. Talk soon.
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