No, I’m not talking about me. Although, David Tennant’s Scottish accent is pretty cute. Ahem, but seriously, I’m recalling a conversation I had with my then seven-year-old daughter. I remember it clearly because it was a triumph moment for me as a mother.
Flossie: Mum, I have three crushes.
Now, just imagine me. I’m driving the car. At these words, my immediate reaction was to — basically — FREAK OUT. I could almost see the words fly out of my mouth. “WHAT! You’re way to young for that. That’s absolutely ridiculous! Who are they? Where are they? Why are they? How are they?” {breathe}
And I’m so very proud to say I literally grabbed the words as they came out of my mouth and swallowed them hard. Instead I said — nonchalantly, like we were talking about the cows in the paddock. I tell you, it took a great deal of self-control.
Me: Yes darling? Is there something about these boys that are special.
Flossie: Yeah, they’re really nice and kind.
Me: They are lovely qualities in a person aren’t they?
Flossie: Yeah.
Me:You’re growing up Flossie. And it’s okay to notice boys and think they are nice. When I was a girl, a boy and I where chosen go to the office to do a job for a teacher. I thought this was pretty special. I love it how you’ve noticed one of the important qualities in a person: kindness.Thank you for telling me about it. {We talked a little more about the ins and outs of crushes.}
I was grateful she was willing to talk to me about it. I could have easily followed through on my first instinct, and potentially closed off the communication channel between us. As a parent, I’ve made many mistakes so, when I actually do it right, I triumph the moment; I celebrate it.
Have you had a parenting triumph moment?
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31 Comments
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Angela Hall
July 17, 2010 at 11:10 amlol oh well done Kelly!
That is a special triumph I would say. There is so much to worry about as a parent when your little babies are growing up all too fast, but I think all we can hope for is that they are comfortable enough to tell us about it when special things happen. I hope I remember to maintain my composure when it gets to that stage for me.
<3
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 17, 2010 at 8:40 pmBeautifully said Ang.
Sarah
July 17, 2010 at 2:44 pmGreat triumphant moment! So very proud of you!
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 17, 2010 at 8:40 pmThanks Sarah. 😀
Lilian
July 17, 2010 at 5:24 pmThank you for this Kelly…
I am a little wiser today for having read this… and more prepared when the time comes…
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 17, 2010 at 8:41 pmWhat a sweet comment Lilian. It made me happy. Thank you xx
Nicole
July 18, 2010 at 7:09 amOh to have such a wise woman share her parenting we are so lucky. I will remember this in a few years time when miss 4 confesses her love for a young man.
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 18, 2010 at 7:49 amOh Nicole, you are good for my heart xx
Jessica
July 18, 2010 at 9:19 amWowsers. That had to knock the wind out of you initially. Great job on the nonchalance! Sounds like you two have a very special relationship- one with trust and love 🙂
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 18, 2010 at 8:37 pmOh it did! We do have a special relationship. It’s a beautiful thing.
Hear Mum Roar
July 18, 2010 at 11:29 amLOL! I know what you mean. When my daughter told me about her first crush, I was rather horrified. But because I stayed calm on the outside, much like you, over the years, she’s always felt keen to tell me about each new crush.
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 18, 2010 at 8:38 pmYes… stay calm on the outside, stay calm on the outside, stay calm on the outside. LOL
Charlotte
July 18, 2010 at 11:54 amCongrats on having such a strong and beautiful bond with your daughter. That she is able to confide in you says a lot about your parenting! Sounds like you’re doing a fantastic job 🙂
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 18, 2010 at 8:39 pmWhat a lovely thing to say. Thank you Charlotte.
The Redhead Riter
July 18, 2010 at 4:11 pmJust keep the line of communication open, remain not judgmental, and don’t EVER look like you are about to panic so that when she turns 17, she will still be telling you stuff.
Mom gets an A+ today!
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 18, 2010 at 8:41 pmGood advice, good advice. Thank you. Somedays I get a C, sometimes I even get a D and sometimes I get an A+ YAY
Kristin (Wanderlust)
July 20, 2010 at 4:30 amWow, well done you! As mom to a 7-yr-old daughter I share your alarm at such an off-the-cuff statement coming out of the mouth of a babe. I’m not sure I would have handled it so gracefully.
BTW, also share your love of Scottish accents, though my biggest crush, hands-down, is on Aussie accents. Num num!
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 20, 2010 at 5:12 amThanks WL. HA! But Australians don’t have an accent, everyone else does. LOL.
Ashley
July 20, 2010 at 11:12 amGreat job! I am in my early twenties now and I definently feel uncomfortable talking with my mom about my relationships because she was very negative and didn’t want to talk about that sort of thing.
Kelly Be A Fun Mum
July 20, 2010 at 12:58 pmThanks for commenting Ashley. It just goes to show how important it is to have a relationship without negative barriers — from a young age. I really appreciate your point of view so thank you so much for taking the time to comment. Did you find someone else to turn to, or did you deal with it all yourself? Love Kelly x
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