What a little bird taught me…

{Pet Cockatiel}

The Love the Moment Challenge for November is about greeting my loved ones with a big smile. I find it easier to be exuberant with my kids than my husband.  There are two main reason for this. Firstly, my children’s well-being is constantly on my mind (and much of my responsibility) so making an effort weighs heavily on me.  Secondly, my husband usually comes home at the end of the day when I’m tired and feeling feral and trying to get all the kids in bed, so it’s more of a challenge. However, I am making the effort to greet him with a big smile and kiss when he comes home. In the midst of raising children I don’t want to forget to invest in our marriage.

{Our Wedding Day}

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What a little bird taught me…

It was after 7pm and I was nagging encouraging the children to brush their teeth.   I had a headache.  I couldn’t wait for the kids to be in bed so I could sit in quiet with a cup of tea.  I listened to our bird sing before I heard the familiar sound of wheels crunching the rocks on the driveway. Our bird always anticipates the husband’s arrival with excited squeaks. Without fail, he churps an happy greeting, right from when the car drives up until Matt walks through the door.  Our bird consistently shows more excitement at my husband’s homecoming than I do! I’m always happy to see my husband but I feel tempted to greet him with a list of issues I’ve had that day or with, “Here! The kids are all yours!”

The kids got to him before I did. “D–A–D–D–Y!” I watched my husband interact with them and felt grateful for a wonderful father for my children.  After the initial onslaught, I gave my husband a big hug and kiss (as has become my custom for November). This month, we will celebrate 12 years of marriage. 12 years, 4 kids, 10 moves and a whole lot of highs and lows.

Matty and I, we’ve learned a lot in our 12 years of marriage.  I know how much my husband needs respect and comfort. My husband knows I need verbal affirmation and understanding. He helps me around the house (and with the kids) as much as he can and I respect his work and offer comfort and love when he comes home. This partnership is a two way street. It’s about learning to communicate our respective needs, making the choice to put eachother’s needs above our own and pulling together as a team based on love and trust.  This relationship is a beautiful thing but it’s easy to overlook it as we parent and get caught up in the busyness of life.  Then cracks form.

{12 years married and counting}

Later that night Matt said, “Thank you for being so lovely when I come home. I really appreciate it.”

Just the other day he said, “You always look beautiful when I come home. Thank you.”

And I recently received this text message from him.

* I did check with my husband before writing about these conversations.

A little bird taught me what it is to be consistent with happy greetings. A happy greeting: it’s only a little thing but these small consistent things build something strong overtime.  Invest in the moments that matter; this is one of them for me.

What a little bird taught me: Invest in the Moments that matter.

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Love the Moment Challeng: A Simple Greeting